Justice

Visitors wander through the museum. I weave amongst them barely noticed. Only my breath against their skin. The others emerge from the deep shadows. We watch as Eden enters through the main door with a girl hanging on his arm. As we used to be, she is naïve. Eden brings all his victims here before sending them on.

The mist that appeared earlier in the day swirls around the statue Eden and his companion are admiring. It disappears and the statue moves. Eden drops to the floor clutching his chest. We eagerly wait until he stands amongst us.

~~

“Friday Fictioneers” is a weekly challenge hosted by Rochelle Wisoff Fields. The challenge is to write a story using only 100 words in response to a photo prompt. This week’s photo was taken by Roger Bultot. It has been a lot of fun to join in with this fantastic and encouraging group of writers! For more stories, click here.

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40 Comments Add yours

  1. neilmacdon says:

    Great atmosphere

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks so much, Neil! 🙂

      Like

  2. draliman says:

    I guess Eden’s past victims have had their revenge? And now they’re going to rip him to shreds.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yep, his time has come. 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

  3. Iain Kelly says:

    Revenge served cold.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. They’ve waited patiently for this day! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Dale says:

    Guess he was planning on one victim too many…

    Liked by 1 person

    1. He got greedy, but they knew he would. I’ve written very little in the scary, ghostly realm but it was quite fun. 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Dale says:

        Good for you

        Liked by 1 person

  5. You managed to create a ghostly atmosphere and whole backstory of Eden and his victims. Beautifully done!

    Susan A Eames at
    Travel, Fiction and Photos

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks so much for your encouraging comments, Susan! It was fun to try something a bit different. 🙂

      Like

  6. lisarey1990 says:

    So much detail. Great job.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks so much, Lisa! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Brilliantly written – I almost felt I was there!

    Click to visit Keith’s Ramblings!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m so glad, thank you for your encouragement! =)

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Sandra says:

    I love a good come-uppance. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. For sure, so do I! =)

      Like

  9. pennygadd51 says:

    You’ve created an excellent atmosphere in this piece. I particularly liked “Only my breath against their skin.” Woo! I had shivers down my spine at the thought! The statue coming alive awoke echoes of Mozart’s ‘Don Giovanni’ for me, where Don Giovanni is dragged down to hell in one of the most terrifying of all opera scenes.
    Great story!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Wow, thank you so much, Penny. I enjoyed giving it a go, writing a scary piece. I’ll have to try it again. =)

      Liked by 2 people

      1. pennygadd51 says:

        Yes, go for it!

        Like

  10. AMelodyPearson says:

    Revenge is sweet and they saved his last victim at the same time. Nice.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks for commenting! Saving the last victim was an added bonus. =)

      Like

  11. The last line is powerful. His time has come. Wonderful imagination.

    https://trailbrooklane.blogspot.com/2018/06/the-statue.html

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much! I tried to build the drama. He certainly deserved it. =)

      Like

  12. Uh OH! Wonder who his next victim is!! Great story!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It’s so nice that she has been spared! =)

      Liked by 1 person

  13. Anna Rymer says:

    Very intriguing – you create great atmosphere 😁

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much, Anna! =)

      Like

  14. Dear Brenda,

    Eden’s apparently met his match. Nicely done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Rochelle. He certainly has. =)

      Like

  15. granonine says:

    Ah, finally! I don’t think he’s going to like being among his victims 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I don’t think so either! =)

      Liked by 1 person

  16. I wonder who the others were… other women scorned?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. They were, unfortunately, his other victims, gathering together as he crossed over. Time for justice. =)

      Like

  17. jillyfunnell says:

    Only my breath against their skin – lovely phrase. A very intriguing story, Brenda.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much, Jilly, and for letting me know the phrase you enjoyed. =)

      Like

  18. Well done for dipping your toes in the water of scary-stories for the first time. The breath against their skin is a delightful touch as well as “others emerge from the deep shadows.” I just watched “Ghost” again and your others remind me of the ghosts toward the end of the movie.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m sorry for the delay in responding. Thank you so much, Alicia. I’m very happy you enjoyed the story. It was a lot of fun telling it. Now I want to watch “Ghost” again! =)

      Liked by 1 person

  19. Jan Morrill says:

    Excellent use of the prompt. Spooking, haunting tension all in 100 words!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, Jan, for your encouraging words! 100 words is certainly a challenge. =)

      Like

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